


When the Doors Close

by Crazy_panda_25



Category: Coronation Street
Genre: Almost Love Confession, Angst, Billy's past mentioned, Claustrophobia, Conversations, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Love, M/M, Panic Attacks, Paul is canonically claustrophobic, Set in the future, Very brief mention of Kel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:48:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21534721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crazy_panda_25/pseuds/Crazy_panda_25
Summary: Billy and Paul get trapped in a elevator together and Paul's claustrophobia rears its ugly head again. Can Billy manage to keep him calm until help arrives?
Relationships: Billy Mayhew/Paul foreman
Comments: 4
Kudos: 24





	When the Doors Close

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome, this is my first fanfiction on this couple (hopefully first of many future ones) and in the coronation street fandom. I came on here and was shocked to see how little stories there is on this terrific couple so I decided to make one for myself! I really hope you enjoy!
> 
> The current story on coronation street is so heartbreaking but amazingly acted by both Peter Ash and Daniel Brocklebank! I'm new to Coronation Street myself but I'll certainly be sticking around

'Why're we here again?"

Billy shakes his head at his boyfriend, "I'm here to talk to one of my parishioners, you're here to hang around for some reason."

"Hey, ya know she loves me, it's my boyish charm," Paul grins, knocking his shoulder into Billy's, "even you agreed last time."

Billy rolls his eyes at him, "She was at the church last time. Don't make this a habit, not sure the Bishop would be happy if he knew you were tagging along all the time to my home visits."

"What does a man haffta do to spend a bit of time with his boyfriend nowadays."

Billy smirks, holding the door open for Paul, grinning at his glare, "wouldn't class this as a date but whatever floats your boat."

"Cheap date me- Wait, we're not going in that elevator, are we?" Paul asks, frowning at the closed double doors in front of them, "there's stairs, surely that'll be easier-"

Billy shoots him an odd look, "She's on one of the top floors and we're already late, come on."

The elevator dings and the doors open revealing the small room. Billy steps in, oblivious to Paul's anxiety, turning to the control panel to press their floor. Paul hesitates for a second but steps in, not wanting Billy to notice his nervousness, leaning against the back corner trying to make the area look less confined. The doors close, smoothly, closing off the outside world. 

Paul hates having claustrophobia, although he's sure everyone hates whatever phobia they have. He swallows, focusing his mind on Billy, who's checking his phone and replying to a message probably about Summer or to Summer. He smirks, pushing the confined space awareness to the back if his mind behind a locked door, and moving to stand beside his boyfriend.

"Should I be jealous?" Paul jokes, elbowing Billy gently as he looks up at him, "I'm playin' secon' fiddle to a phone."

Billy shakes his head, fondly at him, "Summer's bunked off PE because she forgot one of her trainers again. I swear she does it on purpose."

"Obvs, ya only really forget things like that if ya don't wanna remember," Paul shrugs, smirking at him, "what do ya reckon we could get up to in this lift before we reach the top."

"Ey enough of that," Billy says, pocketing his phone and turning towards Paul a bit, "Vicar duties remember." He gestures to his dog-collar.

"Aren't I your duty, Vicar," Paul grins, smile growing when Billy laughs softly, he settles his hands on Billy's waste, swaying slightly, "you're tempted, ya know you are."

Billy pulls him forward in a brief light kiss but pulls back before it can go any further, "Lead us not into temptation."

Paul makes a face, before smiling again, "is that what you say to all-"

His sentence is cut off when a sharp screeching noise of metal on metal comes from above them and the lights around them start to flicker but luckily only half go off completely. Paul just catches Billy shooting him a concerned look before the whole elevator drops downwards from under their feet. He grips his boyfriends arm, fear and confusion engulfing them.

The elevator doesn't fall all the way down, just jolting downwards as if in warning. Paul wouldn't rate their chances if it had. They both freeze, for a few moments, Paul isn't sure how long for, it could be second, minutes or hours. All he know is that he feels like the room is closing in around him. His head hurts but he can't remember hitting it on anything. Billy is the first to move, testing the ground gently, sighing in relief when the room doesn't drop again. 

"That wasn't good," Billy says, unnecessarily, glancing around the cabin cautiously, "At least the lights haven't fully blown."

"Don't jinx it," Paul finds his voice, sounding breathless even to his own ears.

Billy looks at him concerned, "You alright? You didn't hit you're head or anything?" 

Paul shakes his head, ignoring the throbbing there, "Dunno, don't t-think so." His voice catches slightly and he cures prison for making him hate confined spaces, "are you fine?"

Billy nods, Paul only just catching it in the dull light and his vision swimming, "We'll just have to wait till help comes."

Paul glances at the emergency button on the wall, wondering when Billy pressed it and how he didn't notice. He takes a deep breath in and let's it out slowly, trying to get his breathing under control. Billy is suddenly by his side, looking confused and concerned. 

Paul offers him a fake smile, "this a b-bad time to tell ya I've got claustrophobia?"

Billy closes his eyes, briefly before looking back at him, "I could think of better times, before we got in the lift for starters."

"Sorry," Paul answers, glancing down at the floor, stumbling slightly when it send him dizzy.

"Hey, hey, easy. Sit down, it's all okay," Billy says, softly, helping Paul lower himself to the floor, "they'll come help us soon."

"It might drop again," Paul reminds him, unhelpfully, "don't move around too much."

Billy furrows his brow in mock disappointment, "And here I was thinking I could use the time to practice my tap dancing."

Paul huffs out a laugh.

"Oi I'm being serious," Billy grins, sitting beside him and knocking his shoulder against Paul's, "I'm right good at dancing, me."

"Please tell me ya messin'," Paul laughs, his voice still catching against itself but he feels less like he can't breath now, "You have the co-ordination of a baby giraffe."

"How would you know, you've never seen me dance," Billy laughs at Paul's face, "Yeah of course I'm messin'."

Paul smiles, concentrating on Billy's face as if he's the only think keeping him from falling to pieces. He might actually be. He still doesn't get why Billy's with him at all. The vicar's too nice, too caring for Paul, who spend the majority of his life before rocking up in Weatherfield being a criminal or in prison. Paul's just so different from Billy, he can't seem to stop hurting people, pushing them away behind a enforced wall in his mind. The only way he can keep them there is to snap at them sharply, don't let them care for him, love him. He's broken, something in his mind doesn't let him keep people he loves because he just knows he'll never be good enough for them.

"I don't deserve ya," Paul breaths out, shocking himself that he's said it aloud, he rips his eyes from Billy's face, shifting uncomfortably waiting for Billy's reply.

Billy is silent for a full minute (Paul knows he counted) while Paul glares at the wall opposite them, concentrating on keeping his breathing even and pushing away the fear, that's eating him up of not being able to just leave when he wants to. He doesn't look at Billy, cursing himself for making it awkward like he usually does. How long does it actually take to get a lift working again?

"You think I'm a better person then I am, Paul," Billy says quietly but suddenly almost making Paul jump, "I haven't been, in the past."

"I find that hard to believe," Paul answers, wondering vaguely whether this is the best time to have this conversation.

"I was addicted to painkillers after an-an accident. It all got a bit too much and well, got myself hooked on heroin as well. Not really the perfect vicar imagine," Billy swallows beside him, avoiding looking at Paul even as he tries to catch his eye.

Paul wasn't expecting that, he has to admit. Perhaps it would change most people's perspectives on someone but not Paul. He's met drug addicts, a lot of them, and he knows there's no specific person that end up on that path. Sometimes it's bad people but more time then not they're broken people that just made a mistake that they can't seem to shake off.

"You'll have to do better then that to make me lose opinion of ya, Vicar," Paul says, smirking when Billy looks at him suddenly in confusion, "I know you, Billy, maybe not inside out or any of the cliché rubbish but enough to know ya never would have done any of that if ya weren't at rock bottom."

Billy nods, he's got that far away look that Paul isn't use to seeing on him, "I was, I did something bad, very bad. I hurt a lot of people, Paul, people I cared about. Summer, especially. I pulled myself together for them. But I'm not a good person."

Paul raises his eyebrows, "Thought you weren't meant to lie with your collar on? Or ever actually. Ya couldn't make me believe that, never. I've done things Billy things that would make ya hate me, that your God probably already hates me for-"

Billy shakes his head, "God doesn't hate anyone."

"I could name a few he should hate," Paul answers, leaning his head back against the metal wall, "but I get it. All forgiving and all that stuff."

"Not sure that's how they put it in the Bible but yeah pretty much," Billy jokes, smiling when Paul shoots him an amused look, "are we doing a confessional right now?"

"Don't say that, it sounds like we're going ta die," Paul chastises, shifting his position if he ended up closer to Billy it was purely by accident, "if we were, I'd need a long while to get all my deeds off my chest to even make it half way ta the pearly gates."

"I'm sure that's not true, you're just trying to act hard," Billy jokes, smirking when Paul glares at him, lightheartedly.

"Sex before marriage is a sin, isn't it? We have a lot to repent for," Paul grins, mischievously, elbowing Billy back when he elbows him.

"I'm sure God cares very little for our private life, Paul," Billy shakes his head, his cheeks colouring slightly in a way Paul can't help but find endearing.

I love him, Paul thinks, shocking himself. He was sure for a long while that he didn't know how to love. That Kel had destroyed that in him at fourteen. He spent the majority of his life convincing himself that love was just about control, about risk, about pain, about feeling broken. But it isn't, he knows that now, Billy has shown him that.

"Billy, I-"

The elevator creeks around them, cutting off Paul's confession and bringing back his fear that's he's just about managed to stomp out with ignoring it. Billy grabs his arm as the elevator jolts sharply before starting to move up like it should have been before. Paul hits his head on the wall behind him...hard, making his vision swim and sending him back to square one with his panic attack.

"Paul, you have to calm down okay," Billy says, his voice soft, gentle but it sounds like he's underwater.

He had a panic attack in prison years ago, his first time in the place and was sent to the doctor or whatever he was. Told him what it was and given him pointers on how to avoid them going too far. Breathing exercises, everything but he couldn't remember them right now and it's only succeeding in increasing his stress. He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to think though the thick treacle in his mind. He feels like he's dying, his lungs screaming for oxygen and he just can't inhale enough of it.

"Breath in and out, son," an unfamiliar voice appears, it's gentle in tone but Paul feels even worse. Where's Billy? He breathing catches even more.

There's muffled voices around him but he can't focus on one. He's dying and Billy isn't there, he doesn't care. Why did he ever think he would? Stupid, he never learns. People don't care about him.

"Paul, you need to breath for me, okay? It's going to be okay," Billy's voice is there suddenly, clearer but an undertone of worry colouring his voice, "that's it, follow what I do okay. In, hold for four, out, can you do that?"

Paul feels himself nod, slowly, opening his eyes to meet Billy's and following his boyfriend's breathing. Slowly but surely he feels himself calm down. 

They stay there for a while, Paul focusing on keeping his breathing regular as Billy watches on with concern. There's other people around, Paul notices suddenly, feeling a twinge of embarrassment and guilt. He pushes himself up to his feet suddenly, stumbling slightly as it sends him dizzy.

"Hey, slowly," Billy says, gripping his arm to steady him.

"I'm fine," Paul snaps, shaking his head to clear it, "we're-I'm-"

A young woman walks up to them, smiling warmly, "You feeling better?"

Paul glares at her, "We need to go, we-I've wasted enough-"

"Paul, come on," Billy says from beside him, rubbing his shoulder in comfort, "you've not wasted anyone's time."

"What happened to the elevator? Why did it-stop?" He trails off lamely, shifting on his feet awkwardly.

"We aren't sure yet, that's what we're investigating. The lift will be closed for a while for safety check," The woman answers, she's smiling at him in the way a lot of women do, that flirtatious way that does nothing for Paul, thank god he's not straight, "We can-"

"No, we've, he's got a job to do. Vicar duties and all that," Paul brushes her off, abruptly, he turns to Billy, "sooner we get this done, sooner we get home." The implication isn't said but he can tell the woman got it as she walks away looking a bit embarrassed.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Billy asks, watching his face with a clear look of anxious worry, "you had a panic attack-"

"I know, Billy, no need to make a big thing about it," Paul snaps, agitated to leave here with some of his shattered dignity intact, he starts walking away, Billy following him, "I know what you're thinking an' all, it was stupid, I know, I just-"

"No, Paul, no, I'm not thinking that at all," Billy says, sounding almost hurt, pulling the both of them to a stop, "it wasn't stupid. It was terrifying, so unbelievably terrifying to see you like that and I know it had to be ten times more terrifying for you."

"I was fine when we were talking, I don't know why-"

"Distraction, probably. You banged your head when the elevator jolted, it would have confused you and made the fear worse maybe or just uncovered it again," Billy says, softly, running his hands up and down Paul's arms soothingly, "it's okay to not be okay sometimes, you know? Especially around me."

Paul swallows, nodding slowly. He knows that, but it doesn't mean he wants to be...to be vulnerable or helpless around anyone. He's never been able to be that before he found Gemma again, found Billy so it's not like he's exactly practices on not bottling emotion up and training it into anger over fear or hurt or anything at all that could appear weak to others.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," Paul says, quietly, wondering what exactly Billy wanted him to say.

"You're sorry? I'm the one that should be sorry, I made us go in that elevator in the first place," Billy answers, furrowing his brows in confusion, "you kept saying you couldn't breath and I didn't know what to do, I should have known but I-"

Paul can't remember saying that.

"Panicked? Yeah, me too. Got given loads of breathin' exercises to stop them in prison. They always worked before but I couldn't remember any of 'em," Paul looks Billy in the eyes for the first time since being trapped, he can't place the look that he finds there, a mixture between fear and concern and something else, Paul hates that he can't work out what it is, "it's not your fault, you can't help everyone all the time no matter how much you want to."

Paul says the last part jokingly, smirking at his boyfriend in an attempt to get Billy to smile. It doesn't work. 

"I know I can't but I should be able to help you," Billy answers, biting his lip gently and looking down between them, "I'm your boyfriend and I just-i couldn't help-"

Paul shakes his head, insistently, "Billy, stop. Ya did help, ya did, it would have been ten times worse if I was alone and for a lot longer. It has been worse and I've never been trapped in a lift before, that's far worse than some of the other times I've-I've shut down."

Paul cringes at himself, hating how weak it sounds to need someone so much but he has to be honestly for Billy's sake if nothing else.

"When did it start?"

Paul shrugs, "Not sure really, first time I was in prison was the worse but I don't know, perhaps I've had it forever," He nods to himself before stepping back from Billy, "come on, your parishioner will think you've forgetter about her. We must have been stuck in that lift for a while."

"Yeah," Billy nods, but doesn't move to follow Paul, "do you really feel like going though?"

"I do if you do," Paul says, a slight note of challenge in his voice, making it clear he won't destroy anything else.

Billy answers with a nod, obviously tired of arguing against that belief, putting his arm around Paul's back. Paul leans into him slightly as they walk. His attempted confession appearing back into his mind but he doesn't say it. There'll be a better time.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading my work! I really hope you enjoyed! Comments and kudos are always welcome and appreciated!


End file.
